Snow Audition

Was Snow really in a heated debate with a fish?

"You humans are clearly inferior! You don't have enough arms! How can you grab at all the pretties you want if you have only two arms!?"

....Apparently so. It was better than arguing with Gilgamesh.

From his perch on the bleachers of the Coliseum, where his tall form was taking up no less than three rows with him sprawled out as he was, Snow brought a palm up to his face. "That's not even the point!", he spoke enthusiastically, raising a palm at the stupid fish he was having to talk to. What else was he going to do while he was here aside from sit around and talk or fight when there was a chance to fight? And how many people could he really sit around and talk with? The PuPu...squeaked a lot, and Snow didn't talk squeak. Gilgamesh already had a bone to pick with Snow for his interruption while he was making a way-too-long introduction. Typhon....you didn't talk to Typhon and keep your sanity. That left...Ultros. It was a case of picking your poison, but aside from all his talk of "pretties" and general slimy weirdness, he was...well, there wasn't much to him aside from those things. "Humans don't go around grabbing at 'pretties', anyway! I dunno what you fish-people do-"

Ultros slapped one of his tentacles down like a judge with his tiny mallet to object. "I am not fish-people! That is a derogatory term and I will not have it!" Snow shook his head, knowing this was too ridiculous for him to actually get upset with the fish. "Then what even are you?" He thought he could see the fish straightening himself proudly. This was worse than dealing with Barthandelus had ever been... "The correct term is octopi. And we octopi pride ourselves on having more than one pretty! Especially me!" In spite of his wanting to just get up and pretending like this had never happened...Snow had to consider, he could only take a lap around the Coliseum and come back and then he'd have to talk more anyway. So he just shook his head. "Well human women are never gonna want to hang out with a f-"

It wasn't remembering the "proper term" that caused Snow to pause. It was the Arbiter of Time speaking up again to announce that someone new had shown up. Snow turned to see who had been unlucky enough to get stuck out here again, hoping but not counting on it being Serah who'd come back yet again-

His eyes widened and his jaw dropped in disbelief. No, not Serah...but unless Snow was really going crazy...it was the closest thing.

He stood from his place, looking down towards the center of the area where the new challenger was standing and being introduced. "Lightning?", he said aloud. There was almost no doubt in his mind that it really was her. He could only see her from the back from where he was standing, concealed by the arena's pillars, but...that was Lightning. Her hair, her stance, her stature, everything. "Sis..." he mumbled, under his breath, before it finally dawned on him that the fish was talking again. "Now there is the kind of pretty not seen here before!" Snow turned on the fish with a clear scoff before his attention immediately returned to the pinkette below him whom he'd been searching for all this time - a task which had led him here. "Lightning!", he called loudly, but about the time he did, the Arbiter called for the start of Lightning's fight. Wait...no...he was calling on Valfodr for her? Snow grit his teeth as he saw the large centaur-like combatant step into the arena. He never doubted Lightning with anything...but Valfdor was in a whole different league from most of the fighters here. And heck if Snow was about to let Light get taken down here, of all places, just when Serah was getting close to saving her.

He tried to stay put, knowing he wasn't technically supposed to get involved in someone else's fight, but seeing Lightning hit the ground moved him immediately to act. He let out a light growl, starting to move his way down the bleachers. "Where do you think you're going!? You're not supposed to fight someone else's battle!" Snow didn't even regard the fish as he recklessly jumped his way down, only catching the last few words from Ultros as he landed in the actual battlefield itself. "Bring her to me when you're finished with her!"

...Like that was going to happen.

Snow broke off in a dead run, rushing to where Lightning was still seated on the ground, recovering from the impact of the first shot Valfdor got in. Valfdor was already getting prepared to attack again, and Snow, digging deep for a little extra speed, arrived just about the time Valfdor was going to reach Lightning. With a loud battle cry and a lunge so he didn't crash into Lightning, Snow landed on his feet and set his jaw. There was only one solution this situation called for.

"Steelguard!", he screamed, just before the axe of Lightning's opponent crashed down on them both.

ACCEPTED!

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